COVID-19 Announcement

The Madison Hash House Harriers regret to admit that COVID-19 is not a normal threat we can either run away from or drink into oblivion.

We are currently operating under official MH3 COVID PROTOCOL:

  • Masks must be worn at all times when the pack is stopped
  • Maintain social distance of at least 6′ from your fellow wankers
  • No Licking!
  • Pre-packaged food and drink only
  • All activities outside

MH3 COVID PROTOCOL Approved Trail Styles:

  • Staged: Groups of 3-at-a-time spaced 15 minutes apart
  • Virtual: Whatever you like, just so long as no one sees, touches, or licks anyone else!
  • Small group: No more than 10

Update: 9/1/2020 – We’ve had mostly good success this Summer keeping hashes small, socially distant, and masked. Going into the Fall we’re going to keep going small hashes, staged hashing, and virtual/otherwise creative trails.

We are a drinking club with a running problem. We run every Saturday.

5pm during daylight savings time, 3 pm otherwise.

Now with every Full Moon!

Hash locations will always be on the calendar below. If it’s not posted yet, you are too early.

Want to hare? Find an empty date and email

October 31, 2020
  • Remember the Anal Ho!, The Horse Came First, & Just Derek Halloween Full Blue Moon Nightmare Day Drinking Hash and Bar Crawl From Hell With Dinosaurs! #2268
    Start: 3:00 pm
    Date: October 31, 2020  - 1 day from now


    Attention all half-minds of the Madison Hash House Harriers: October 31st is a Saturday! Halloween! and a Full Moon! It's also the time of Covid which is a bummer, but this tour of Jurassic Park will make space for several hashers to participate. Why Jurassic Park, because Anal Ho! did a book report on it when she was in ninth grade. That's why. She's also obsessed with dinosaur erotica, so there is that too. Also the Horse Came first loves dinosaurs more than she loves Just Derek, so why not?

    Small groups of hashers will start at various locations along the JP tour and travel around the island (in a crawling fashion (i.e. walker/biker/shuffler friendly)) visiting all the rare and exotic dinosaurs that Dr. Wu has to offer and consuming all the shitty booze and snacks that Costco has to offer. So grab the nearest reptilian gear you have (or whatever you want) and hold onto your butts!

    Sign up and rego to reserve your spot in the jeeps! Cost is $5 -- Rego via Vemo (@SammNewton) or Paypal ( by Oct. 26 (ish)... we just want to make sure we have enough of everything for everyone to have the shittiest trail possible.

    Exact addresses of start locations will be disseminated to you eventually, so just sign up for a paddock on the spreadsheet. For all you folders who need to know every detail, plan to start and end somewhere on the isthmus. Don't think about the details too hard. I promise we will take care of you, if you know what I mean 😉 Ceremonies will also be quick and smallish (like most of you wankers) to avoid a super spreader event, then you must go canoodle somewhere else. So plan for an "own-after". There will be several parks nearby at your disposal for further drinking.

    To bring: Your GD mask, your GD vessel, a headlamp, candy to feed the dinosaurs, blow up dinosaur suits, metal pokers to pop the dinosaur suits, your favorite dinosaur erotica novel, some fucking dignity, 1 pound of hand sanitizer, 2 pounds of lube, new shoes, virgins, your neices and nephews, your favorite mathmatician, your thoughts on chaos theory, and of course, your butts.

    <beer />

November 7, 2020
  • 43rd Analversary #2269
    Start: 3:00 pm
    Date: November 7, 2020  - 1 week from now


    Because OF COURSE it's this fucking year that our Analversary falls on a 69 numbered hash. Perfect. This was also the year we had Leap Day, the 4th of July, and Halloween fall on Hashing days AND July 4th and Halloween are both Full Moons. Such a promising calendar... such a garbage year. This year has been, in the immortal words of NumbAss "BULLSHIT!", and I think we all need to let off a little steam. Well, fuck it, we're gonna do something special still for the Analversary, and I'm going to come up with some ways for all of us to participate. I need co-hares, so lemme know if you want to help. MLP

November 14, 2020
  • No Hare Hash Run #2270
    Start: 3:00 pm
    Date: November 14, 2020  - 2 weeks from now


November 21, 2020
  • No Hare Hash Run #2271
    Start: 3:00 pm
    Date: November 21, 2020  - 3 weeks from now


November 28, 2020
  • No Hare Hash Run #2272
    Start: 3:00 pm
    Date: November 28, 2020  - 4 weeks from now